When it itches scratch IT

I work at the Zoo. I don’t do anything with the animals. I sit in a little cubby and write stuff and mail stuff and take orders to do stuff. So I mean other than getting to walk around the Zoo whenever I want to, I don’t really do any of the fun ‘stuff.’

The other day I scored a mysterious bite on my finger. It looked like a lump on the side of my index finger’s knuckle. So being the type of person I am, I stared at it for about .0001 of a second before I decided that I should scratch it, pick it, prod it, and otherwise tick it off until I was satisfied. Satisfaction did not come until my finger started to swell.

I don’t really know what the bite came from, but I definitely made it angry. My finger began to look like a slightly too large Vienna sausage. Not only that, but the animal, because surely a bug could not do anything this malicious, bite grew to about two or three times it’s original size. Ew!

Let this be a lesson to everyone. Maybe when stuff itches… you shouldn’t scratch it, because it will grow to two times it’s original size.

Wait… oh never mind!